A Guide to Thoughtful Behavior

The Funeral Service
The funeral service will differ depending on the religious and personal beliefs of the family. The service may be held at a church, temple, funeral home or residence. Most families choose the funeral home as the setting, with a brief service often following at graveside.

Whether the service is held at the funeral home or at a place of worship, enter quietly and be seated. Depending on the size of the funeral, you be assisted by an usher or funeral home personnel. The first few rows are usually reserved for family members, but you should feel to sit closely behind them to offer them your support and comfort.

The Ceremony
The ceremony is generally conducted by a member of the clergy. Do not worry if you are unfamiliar with the religious customs of the family. Follow the guide of others.

At the Cemetery
If there is a graveside service the chairs at the casket are reserved for immediate family members. You may be asked to stand for a brief graveside service which may include a short prayer or other words of strength and encouragement.

What is appropriate dress?
Black is not required today for visitation or funeral. You should dress in a way to show respect to the family and other mourners. This usually means a suit and conservative tie for men and conservative clothes for women. Children should wear their better clothes, such as what they would wear to church. However, the most important thing is not what you wear, but that you are there.

Should children come to a funeral?
Parents are the best judge of whether their child is old enough to comprehend death and whether attending the funeral will be meaningful to them. It is important that children be allowed to express their grief and share in this important ritual. If you bring your children carefully explain to them the importance of being there and to be on there best behavior.


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384 Communipaw Avenue
Jersey City, NJ 07304
Tel: 201-432-6565
Fax: 201-333-2248


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